In the middle of another family dance session. We bust out some pretty intense moves around here.
The other morning after breakfast, I turned on some upbeat music while I cleaned up the kitchen. The eight kids, initially scattered around the house, heard the tunes and almost like magic, all showed up in the living room and started a dance party.
Our living area is not large, so basically our family “dancing” together entails skipping, twirling, or stomping in a large chain around the sofa and coffee table in an unceasing loop. (Frequent interjections from a parent to slow down, stop running, no pushing past siblings, etc. are also usually a part of these dancing outbreaks – because sometimes competition is a factor.)
This is a pretty common occurrence in our home, and everyone usually has a good time… with a few minor caveats like the kid who inevitably bumps into the hearth or bookshelf, or the child who, in a contrary moment, decides to go the opposite way from everyone else – incurring the frustration and angry protests of the others. Or the youngest who trip on their long dress-up gowns and wail mournfully because the others just keep dancing over and around them. But in general, everyone enjoys themselves and the happy music helps uplift the general atmosphere in our home.
My husband happened to be home this particular morning and was still at the table finishing his coffee. One of our youngest daughters broke from the circle of happily dancing kids and skipped over to him.
Smiling joyously, dimples all showing, she looked up into his face with big excited eyes and cried, “Come dance with us, Daddy!” and reached out to grab his hand.
No one could have resisted such a sweet invitation, least of all her daddy.
And the next thing I knew, I was laughing helplessly over the kitchen sink while my husband spun and twirled in the living room surrounded by a swarm of utterly delighted children. He then unexpectedly jumped up on the middle of the coffee table for an intense air guitar session! The kids cheered wildly while still dancing all around.
Every little face was wreathed in a huge smile, each was laughing, each was moving exuberantly but also more thoughtfully of each other, and everyone’s pleasure in joyfully dancing together was greatly increased… because their daddy was there, too.
Tears came to my eyes, even through my laughter, as I watched this beautiful, happy family moment.
What if we deliberately invited our Father to dance with us each day, too?
We know He’s there, present, in control and able to take care of us, but what if we behaved like a little child and ran over to Him, smiled up at Him and asked Him to join in our small moments, the things we do, the everyday pieces of our life?
What would happen if we were so excited with the idea of having God be in the middle of everything with us that we behaved like it by asking Him to be present in each momenteach day, because we truly believed He would make it better?
I think He would be thrilled to be invited into our days and hearts in this way.
The exuberance and hilarious joy my husband showed in this quick interlude of our family’s day was so precious to me because it illustrated something I firmly believe to be true about our Father – His presence will only add more joy, greater pleasure, deeper consideration for others, and increase our delight in Him and each other.
This is because this is the kind of Father He is.
In this year, I want to always remember to take a moment to break free from whatever it is I am caught up in, run over to my Father, grab His hand, look up into His face, and smilingly, trustingly, invite Him to come be with me in whatever comes.
He’s always in control, He’s always there, but I want to know the joy of dancing together with Him – today, and in every day, no matter what it brings.
Because where He is, my joy – and yours – is fullest.
You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
Psalm 16:11, NLT
It’s as simple as a heart-whisper to Him, “Please come into this moment,” or “You are welcome here, now.”
The difference will be astonishing. Let’s not miss out on extending this invitation.
He’ll always say “Yes!”
– Maria
If you enjoyed this post, please consider sharing it, thanks!
And if you’re not already, please know you are invited to join my members-only East Willow Place collective (sign up below)! Each article will be delivered straight to your inbox to read at your leisure, as well as a weekly special note from me.
Thank you for the gift of your thoughtful reading of my words. I’m very humbly grateful.
Look at these babies! (And I would do it again in a heartbeat.)
On this day, years ago, I once heard a sermon on the Wedding at Cana (John 2) which I have never forgotten. The pastor, a sweet-faced, white-haired gentleman, spoke sincerely and earnestly.
He was my grandfather, and I have always remembered this sermon because it was at my own wedding, nineteen years ago.
The story of the wedding at Cana is significant because it was the setting of Jesus’ first miracle. While attending a wedding feast with his disciples, Jesus becomes aware that the couple have underprepared and are about to run out of wine for their guests – an embarrassing and disgraceful predicament, for which there is no quick or cheap solution.
Jesus quietly tells the servants to fill six large stone jars nearby full of water – each able to hold twenty to thirty gallons – and then when they dip some out and take it to the MC to taste, it has become excellent wine. Only the servants know where the wine came from, and the celebration joyfully continues without interruption.
Like the couple married in Cana who ran out of wine for their wedding celebration, even the most prepared person will eventually run out of something in the relationships in their life.
We are imperfect, selfish and broken people, unable to maintain levels of altruistic, unconditional love and kindness for any significant length without needing to be refilled or renewed.
Pride, hurt, self-centeredness, distraction, laziness, or sometimes just exhaustion creep in and our first fiery, intense and purposeful strength begins to fade, slowly burn out, and trickle instead of pour.
Even if we try to refill the supply on our own, what we often find we have is just… water. Great for survival, perhaps, but not so much for celebration.
This is why we must invite Jesus into our lives, our marriages, and our relationships!
We need to seek His grace, trust His compassionate kindness, and ask for Him to step in and do something we cannot: transform our acts of duty, of faith, of slogging service into deeds done from love.
He comes and takes the water we have and transforms it into wine.
Something ordinary and draining like serving and caring for a husband, a wife, a sibling, a parent, a child, in the gritty, unfiltered, day-to-day scenarios of living life together becomes a beautiful, celebratory, joy-filling delight.
But this can happen only if:
1. We invite Him and welcome His presence. (Jesus didn’t party-crash. He was an invited guest.)
2. We admit our own lack and ask for His help in our need. (His mother noticed the problem and told Him about it, trusting that He could and would do something about it.)
3. We listen to His instructions and obey them quickly. (The servants didn’t balk at the strange request but chose to humbly obey, thereby earning the place of being witnesses of the Messiah’s first miracle.)
This is not some rose-colored, pie-in-the-sky pipe dream of wedded (or other relational) bliss worthy of any Hallmark movie.
This is the same miraculous, stunning alchemy that happened when water transformed to wine: Our daily lives filled with miscommunications, dirty diapers, burned pancakes and traffic lights can become times to celebrate and rejoice because Jesus is present.
God with us.
Immanuel.
It’s not just a word for a baby in a manger.
It’s for a loving Friend who comes into your home and touches your marriage with hope, joy, and fresh life when you are burning out and feeling empty.
It’s for a tender Father who holds your hurting bewildered heart when you don’t have the foggiest idea how to parent your child but He does.
It’s for a sweet freshness and renewed strength in carrying on with a work you’re bone-weary of walking in.
He can come. He wants to come! He knows our need. He can take our offered colorless normal and transform it into something intoxicating and delightful, rich and vibrant, worthy of a party.
Because if we are His followers, the life we live now should carry notes of the music in the Wedding Feast to come. We should be practicing the steps to dance now. We should be looking ahead with joyful anticipation of the celebration and the smiles of hope should be shining on our faces today.
He gives that joy – He IS that Joy. His Joy is our strength, and our water becomes wine in His presence.
Nineteen years ago I married my best friend. We invited Jesus to our wedding, and into our marriage. Despite our own brokenness and frequent failings, in His gracious kindness He meets us daily in our lack, and we celebrate our love because of His.
{To my faithful, courageous husband – I love you. Thank you for marrying me.}
There will be seasons of your life where you feel you have been firmly and irrevocably stuck in the dark, upside down, and for an indeterminate time. Yet you must remember: you are never forgotten or left alone. Each day the Master’s hand is there with you in the dark, turning you, noticing you, carefully and expertly caring for you.
My Beautiful Loves:
Do you remember how in the Old Testament, God’s law commanded that once they were in the Promised Land, the Israelites were to offer up a drink offering of wine along with the other sacrifices they gave? (Numbers 15, 28, 29, Leviticus 23) This was to mark the Sabbath of resting in peace in the land after their long time of travels and battles, and was to be a gift to God. The wine represented the joy in the sacrifice, the celebratory part of offering up the best of one’s labors. Later in the New Testament, the Apostle Paul speaks about how he is being “poured out as a drink offering” (Philippians 2:17, 2 Timothy 4:6), comparing his work to the wine offered alongside the labors of the churches, both giving joy to God and others as he poured out his efforts for the Kingdom of God.
One morning during my quiet time, I prayed that if I was being poured out as a drink offering to God, I wouldn’t be just wine, I would be champagne! Champagne is a very special, sparkling wine that can only come from a specific place in the world, the Champagne region of northern France[1]. It is traditionally used for celebrations and joyful occasions, and can be quite costly. I wanted God to find such joy in my delighted, exuberant life of vivacious service and celebration of outpouring of love to Him that it was something He would find delicious and intoxicating.
In the days following this prayer I began to research Champagne – both the region and the wine, because I realized I didn’t know very much about it. I figured if that’s what I wanted to be like, I should probably learn about it!
I discovered that the place known for the vineyards and wineries that created celebratory wines used for toasting and parties was also “one of the most blood-soaked and fought-over regions in the world, let alone Europe (Millar, 2014)“. Champagne lay in the path of a main route for any of the many armies marching through eastern France, and as such, experienced much bloodshed and battle. The birthplace of these famous wines endured many vicious wars, many of which have left scars and residual evidence on local architecture and land to this day.
It might seem intuitive that champagne, being such a bubbly, joyous wine, would come from somewhere bright and sunny with fertile soil, but instead the region of Champagne is the most northerly wine-growing region in the world, and as such, is diabolically difficult to produce high or even certain yields of grapes. It is misty, cool, often rainy, and a notoriously capriciously-weathered area. The soils there are known to be exceptionally chalky, dry, poor, and challenging to produce any high yields of crops. That is without mentioning the mildew, various diseases, and pests that also plague local vine growers.
After all these challenges to just growing a vineyard of grapes, the real difficulty begins: Actually creating the wine. The process of producing champagne is highly regulated by French governmental regulations and a bureau specifically designated for the enforcement of strict requirements on things like: when to harvest (a short window of a few weeks), how much they may harvest, the specific type of grapes allowed, how many pressings are allowed, how much juice is allowed, and many other stringent guidelines.
After the bottling is finally complete, the task is far from done: then comes the lengthy wait in the dark. It is estimated that over six hundred miles of tunnels underground were built to cellar the champagne – and it takes about a minimum of year and a half to age to maturity. It is stored in the dim coolness underground in racks, tilted upside down. Every day a vintner carefully turns the bottles by hand. Every single one. They do this so the sediment in the wine will collect in the neck of the bottle and leave the wine clear.
Then the wine is flash-frozen, the tops are popped off, the frozen chunk of ice in the neck with all the sediment is shot out, they add a dose of sugar to increase the bubbling fermentation of the yeast, and it is recorked and recapped tightly to prepare it for labeling and sale.
Then these bottles travel around the corner or around the world, where finally they are given their moment – a joyful celebration! And they are uncorked, poured out, enjoyed, and emptied.
This entire process from vine to empty glass is fascinating to me. I think we can learn a lot from champagne. Through no choice of our own, we may encounter tragic loss, suffering, and grief that leave deep wounds on our hearts and blood in the soil of our lives. Sometimes the neat rows of vines of a peaceful, happy life that we long for actually look more like miles of muddy, embattled trenches scarring the landscape of our years as we face trauma, pain, and struggle.
My children, I want you to understand: Life can be very hard in seasons. Life will bring sorrow and pain. This is not a threat – it’s a promise. “Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows,” Jesus said (John 16:33). And Paul declares: “Indeed, all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution.” (2 Timothy 3:12) We all cope with the realities of a world marred by sin and death (Romans 5:15), but we also have hope! The sentence above spoken by Jesus was not finished: “In this world you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”
When we place our faith in our lovely and loving Master Gardener, we know that even though a current time seems dark and heavy, we know that He has endured the worst this world had to offer and has emerged victorious, leading the way for us who live keeping our eyes on Him (Hebrews 12:2-3). He was the Man of Sorrows, familiar with our grief (Isaiah 53:3), and He will give us the peace-filled hearts we need, no matter the wars raging outside (John 14:27).
While we may wish for the sunny skies and lush, fertile ground of a blissful, idyllic home environment, we might endure the cold mist of family discord, storms of disappointments or broken hopes, difficult chronic health situations or lack of financial stability. Various things might be in our lives that seem like a plot of harsh, infertile chalk to grow in or like swarms of pests that suck the lifeblood out of us and wither our best efforts. James encourages us to consider such situations as opportunities to experience God’s great joy (James 1:2). Romans encourages, “Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying” (Romans 12:12).
This is not only counter-cultural, it’s counter-natural; which is exactly the point. These situations are allowing us to grow in ways that aren’t according to our humanity but our spirituality. We are given these challenges to practice the Spirit-led joy that will set us apart and mark us as children of God, the brothers and sisters of Christ Jesus (Romans 8:29), who for the joy before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and now sits at the right hand of God the Father (Hebrews 12:2).
We all experience immovable boundaries and “regulations” which we must keep – we are all humans made of flesh: susceptible to flu viruses, heat, cold, the law of gravity, and requirements for food and sleep. Depending on where we live we are also obligated to follow certain rules: driving on a certain side of the street, stopping or going at different colored lights, or being required to undergo a certain amount of education if we expect gainful employment. (And just so I’m very clear, another restriction is that in our country the legal age to drink alcohol is 21 years old. I don’t care how amazing you think my champagne analogy is, you are absolutely not allowed to drink it before then and that’s the final word on that. Boom.)
While in general we understand that these rules are for our overall benefit, it is also not uncommon to feel that they can seem hampering or restrictive at times. God has uniquely chosen each person’s life and the restrictions for it. His loving, all-wise Father’s eyes saw each of you before you were born (Psalm 139), and He decided ahead of time exactly where He would place you in this world, the special gifts and skills you would bring, and the people you would bless (like me!).
He also chose the things that you find challenging, the areas you might need to work really hard on, and the tough situations which would bewilder you. There are no mistakes in His loving plan for you. He looks at you with deep pride and creative joy as an artisan would look at a masterpiece (Eph 2:10, NLT). So take heart, belovedests. You are in His hand, no matter what sort of rigorous matrix of restrictions you may feel hampered by. And that’s truth.
Grapevines produce best when they have been tied up on wires, pruned somewhat stringently, and have endured the heat and the cold of both sun and storms. Wine is more valuable when it is the genuine article, not tampered with varietals that are inferior or methods that rush to make a quick profit. Our Father’s tender care and great knowledge are in force with each of you – He carefully walks the rows of your life, thoughtfully deciding what and when and how would bring the best harvest for both you and Him. The wise vine is one which joyfully submits to the restrictions – from this joy comes the fruit.
Life often is tough. The stresses and challenges put pressure on us. What are we giving out when we experience the weight and the squeezes that will inevitably come? Bitter angst and complaints, stoic grunts of calloused resistance, or bursts of loving trust and hope?
In champagne making, the first press – that in which the grapes release their juice without breaking the skins – is called the cuvee blanc. It is the most delicately aromatic, the most precious, and the most difficult to preserve because of the lack of tannins (the bitter-tasting acidic chemical that delays spoilage), so it is bottled and enjoyed close to the place it was created. (There is a saying that the best wines never leave France.)
The second press breaks the skins of the grapes, releasing the acidic tannins, and this is the pressing that is used to create the majority of sparkling wine that is created for sale and shipment.
The third press is the most acidic of all, and the least flavorful, and is used largely to mix with other juices to provide the tannins they will need to make a decently-bodied wine. Anything left after this third pressing is discarded or used for composting.
Notice that the first pressing is the most precious and the most fragrant: that which the grapes give up freely, sacrificially, joyfully, is of the highest value and also without bitterness. I pray that when you face the crushing weight of life and when you feel you are in a place where you are stressed and pressured, you turn your faces up to God with hope. I pray that in loving trust of His Father’s heart for you, you freely surrender and give up your thanksgiving and worship in that moment. This is what “the sacrifice of praise” means. “Giving thanks is a sacrifice that truly honors me,” God says (Ps. 50:23, NLT).
The more we resist the challenges and the difficulties with hardened hearts, the more bitterness leaches into our lives, ultimately rendering them undrinkable and worth little to anyone. The worship from your heart given in these moments is like a choice cuvee blanc – it is fragrant, pure, and very precious to our Father.
There will be seasons of your life where you feel you have been firmly and irrevocably stuck in the dark and upside down, for an indeterminate time. Yet you must remember: you are never forgotten or left alone. Each day the Master’s hand is there with you in the dark, turning you, noticing you, and carefully and expertly caring for you.
Sometimes the sediment of our selfish hearts, sinful habits, or the clutter of our daily lives creates a murkiness that needs to be purified so that we can have what our Father longs for us to have: a clear, delightful, focused relationship with Him. This brings a fullness of joy that nothing can steal (Psalm 16:11). Sometimes this focus can only come about by a period of being upside down in the dark.
By submitting to this cleansing process and actively agreeing to surrender the “things that hinder and the sins that entangle” (Heb 12:1) we will be exceptionally joyful ourselves because we will be fulfilling what we were inherently created for – enjoying God and reflecting Him and His glory. Being joyful and patient in the dark is a way of telling God you love Him. It is declaring your trust in Him. It is proclaiming that you agree that He is faithful to complete and bring to perfection the work He began in you (Phil 1:6).
My chickadees, if you could only understand the utter beauty of a life lived in joyful loving surrender and trust to our King! It creates a thing of finest worth and clear brilliance, fully delightful and bubbling with joy. Our lives are not our own, and we are not promised tomorrow. Make the offering of your life one of such extravagant joyful faith in Him that He is utterly delighted and intoxicated by your love, proud and pleased to taste the exquisite vintage you have made with Him.
Here’s to lives of deep joy poured out for our King!
Cheers.
Mom
[1] Many other countries create sparkling wines, but the Champagne region in France has trademarked the appellation “Champagne” so that only wines from this specific region are allowed to use this name.
